A return to bleah

For the first time in a month, I'm going back for more chemotherapy this afternoon. Dread is hardly the word to describe my state right now. Even after a couple of extra weeks off from the treatment because of that nasty blood clot, I still don't feel well.

I continue to have back and torso pains that move around, requiring painkillers (mild ones, so far), and which have sometimes kept me awake. The only appointment I could get at the B.C. Cancer Agency Pain Clinic is on Wednesday, when I'll still be in pretty sad shape from the chemo—but I need to go to help manage my symptoms. My intestinal tract is still periodically misbehaving itself, which is never fun. I'm often weak and tired, and though the scale tells me I haven't lost more weight, I'm still too skinny, but I can't eat as much as I used to either because of the above-mentioned problems.

That said, Halloween was fun yesterday: my wife and daughters and our friend The Badger wandered the neighbourhood collecting goodies, while I manned the door here at home. We had a pretty big mob of kids, though because of a larger-than-usual candy purchase, we still have lots of supplies left over. My youngest went so hard at the trick-or-treating that she didn't wake up till 9:30 this morning—I'm working to get her to school for lunchtime. I had fun setting up a new (to us) iMac I acquired from Alistair. The 24" screen is huge in our kitchen.

The next few days are going to suck for me and for my family. You'd think we'd be used to it, but no. Cancer doesn't give us even that luxury.